Immaculate Heart of Mary Catholic Church

Homily for December 31, 2006
Liturgical Year C- Cycle I
The Holy Family

By Fr. John Carney
Topic: The Family
+  +  +

Reading 1
Sir 3:2-7, 12-14
God sets a father in honor over his children; a mother’s authority he confirms over her sons.  Whoever honors his father atones for sins, and preserves himself from them.  When he prays, he is heard; he stores up riches who reveres his mother.  Whoever honors his father is gladdened by children, and, when he prays, is heard. Whoever reveres his father will live a long life; he who obeys his father brings comfort to his mother.

My son, take care of your father when he is old; grieve him not as long as he lives.  Even if his mind fails, be considerate of him; revile him not all the days of his life; kindness to a father will not be forgotten, firmly planted against the debt of your sins—a house raised in justice to you.


Gospel
Lk 2:41-52
Each year Jesus’ parents went to Jerusalem for the feast of Passover,  and when he was twelve years old,  they went up according to festival custom. After they had completed its days, as they were returning, the boy Jesus remained behind in Jerusalem, but his parents did not know it.  Thinking that he was in the caravan, they journeyed for a day and looked for him among their relatives and acquaintances, but not finding him, they returned to Jerusalem to look for him.  After three days they found him in the temple, sitting in the midst of the teachers,   listening to them and asking them questions, and all who heard him were astounded at his understanding and his answers.  When his parents saw him, they were astonished, and his mother said to him, “Son, why have you done this to us?  Your father and I have been looking for you with great anxiety.”  And he said to them, “Why were you looking for me?  Did you not know that I must be in my Father’s house?’  But they did not understand what he said to them.  He went down with them and came to Nazareth, and was obedient to them; and his mother kept all these things in her heart.  And Jesus advanced in wisdom and age and favor before God and man.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I chose the alternate reading from the Book of Sirach today because it is such a beautiful reading and it is so important for family life. Sirach was written by a man named Joshua, or Jesus ben Sira son of Eleazar, son of Sirach. It is also referred to at times at times as the book of Ecclesiasticus, not Ecclesiastes, but Ecclesiasticus. That title of Sirach means the Church Book. That title, the Church Book, is kind of like the book of family life, of church life. It’s part of the wisdom literature of the Bible. The author was a scribe or a teacher. It is believed that he ran an academy for Jewish boys about 180 years before Christ. This was a period when with Greek culture influenced Jerusalem and Israel. There was a constant battle between the Jews who wanted to keep their ways and the Greeks, or the Greek culture, which wanted to impose their ways, which were absolutely opposed to Jewish tradition. It was a period of great sexual promiscuity. There was a lack of respect for the Jewish notion of family unity. There was an arrogance of Greek philosophy being superior to Jewish philosophy. Therefore, the author of Sirach wanted his students, his pupils, to know who they were, who they are, to know what it is to be a Jew, what it is to have these traditions and these understandings of God in a very difficult time.

If you fast forward 180 years, we read the beautiful Gospel account of the Holy Family being together and going together through their Jewish traditions 180 years later with the Romans, who if anything were worse than the Greeks in terms of the influence. It is amazing the Jews have maintained a culture at all with the great pressures they have had over the thousands of years of their existence.

We can fast-forward another two millennium to today and say, “What’s new?” Look at our traditional Catholic understandings and beliefs. Then look outside. Look at the pressure we are under to keep our ways that we believe are righteous ways, good ways, and holy ways. Ways that make us truly happy and ways that promise us eternal life. You parents know what I’m talking about. As you raise your children, you send them forth, and you worry about them because of the pressures out there, the sexual promiscuity, drug and alcohol abuse, and all these other philosophies and concerns and selfishness and false values. The book of Sirach is a good book for us. Read it. It is wisdom, and wisdom never ages. Wisdom is always of God.

Today again, it is good that we focus on the Hoy Family as we end this year and begin a new year because for most people, the family, the traditional family is the basic unit of their lives. The Catechism says this. I think it is a beautiful paragraph and I want to share it with you.

The family is the original cell of social life. It is the natural society in which husband and wife are called to give themselves in love and in the gift of life. Authority, stability, and a life of relationships within the family constitute the foundations for freedom, security, and fraternity within society. The family is the community in which, from childhood, one can learn moral values, begin to honor God, and make good use of freedom. Family life is an initiation into life in society. (CCC 2207)

Indeed, the family has often been called the church in miniature. Parents have the responsibility of teaching your children to love. How do you do that? I think teaching someone to love is like catching a cold; you have to be exposed to it. The greatest way, I am convinced, that parents can teach their children to love is for husband and wife to love each another. Every time we have a baptism, at the end of the ceremony, I bless the mother and the father and then I remind them, I ask them, “Do you love your child?” The guy grumbles, and the woman cries. The baby is just perfect all wrapped up in some kind of white thing, and I say, “If you really love your children, don’t put them first. Put this woman first, put this man first, and your kids will be fine.” Husband and wife, love each other and your kids will catch that wonderful flu called love.

From the vocation of marriage, comes parenthood, in that order. We know that love is sacrificial. We had a baptism Friday, and it was the fourth child of this young family. There were three boys and this was the first girl. You know boys are different from girls. They are wild, and we are trying to baptize, and one of these little guys was mad about something and he was everywhere. I looked at the mother, and they are good strong parents, but this little guy was on one of his little trips, and I looked at the mother and father, and I realized that they were both so tired. The father was holding the little girl and was like “Ahhh.” Because this was not an hour of their week, this was constant. Really, when you have children, you die to yourself completely. You don’t live anymore. Another person comes along. I do not know how you do it. You know I am happily single. The love you have for your children, and the patience you have for them, God Bless you. That is sacrificial.

I often tell this story of my Dad. I had wonderful parents. Talk about sacrifice. I remember I was home from college and I had no money. I was always broke. We didn’t have much money. We always had enough, we weren’t poor. It was a Saturday night, I was sitting there watching some dumb show on TV, and my dad knew I was bored. He said, “Why don’t you go out to Bud’s.” It was this joint on 37th Avenue and 86th street. I had no money. He took out his wallet, and he said, “Oh, let me see.” I could see in the wallet and he only had one bill. He made it seem like he was fanning through all these bills and he took out a twenty, the only bill, and gave it to me. He said, “Go ahead. Go have some fun.” I will never forget that. I’m sure he went without lunch that week and was happy to do it for this schlemiel. I didn’t appreciate it much then. I took the $20 and ran. I feel bad now, but that’s the problem. You don’t really have a good conscience, you can’t really say thanks mom, thanks dad, until you’re 30. I woke up when I was 30 and said, “What are you doing?” It’s like all those years of youth and teenage, and even into your 20’s, you just don’t appreciate your parents and how great they are.

Then of course, Sirach reminds us that children must love their parents. This is the part that the parents like. The Bible, God, orders you to honor you father, to respect the authority of your mother. It says, “Revere your mother and father.” I looked up revere and it means, “To regard with awe.” “Sometimes shock and awe.” “To regard with awe, deference and devotion”. Children should regard their parents with awe, deference, and devotion.

It says, “Take care of your parents when they are old.” That is something we as a society need to relearn. There is a Chinese Proverb that if a family has an old person in it, it possesses a jewel.

There is a story I will never forget; I think I’ve shared it with you in the past. About 10 years ago, there was an article in the Albuquerque Journal about Medicare and Medicaid. There was this elderly woman, who was in a nursing home and she had no resources. The deal with Social Security, as I understand it, is that you go to a nursing home, the government pays for it, but you have to give up your social security check. I think her Social Security check was about $700 a month and she had to give that back, all but around $65. They give you a little bit of money and then the government pays the difference every month. This reporter went on about how little money this poor woman had. It would break your heart. It said that what she missed most was her Dove soap. She couldn’t afford it. She loves Dove soap, which is great stuff here in the winter in New Mexico. It would break your heart. Then at the end of the story, it mentions that she had six children. Where is the Dove soap? If my mother were in a nursing home, she would have Dove soap. I couldn’t believe it. The guy that wrote the article, his whole intent was to show how lousy our government was, how cruel. He missed the whole story. What happened to the family? Those children should have been taking care of the mother with any resource that they had available. I don’t want to get into it, because I think that the government needs to take care of those who are in need, and we need to do it better than we are doing it. When we get old, we are not the government’s responsibility; we are our family’s responsibility. My poor nephews. “There’s Uncle John slobbering in the living room. Give him something to drink.”


All right, children, grieve not your parents, be considerate to them and be kind.

Another note, concerning those who are not married. They are even better able to serve their own families and the larger family of the church. We often leave the single people out, but there are a lot of them out there. These are people with a single vocation who are essential and important and who are part of the larger picture of family life.

Today we celebrate, at the end of the year, the Holy Family. We live in different times, cultures, and nations with the same challenge. That’s what’s important, family.

I was reading on AOL, an article on Tiger Woods yesterday. We are a lot a like, different ethnicities, but a lot alike. We both got hole-in-one’s this past year….Actually, I’m not sure Tiger did. Did Tiger get a hole-in-one last year? Did I? If you’re visiting, yes I did. Anyways, there was a thing about Tiger Woods. The question was “What is the best thing for Tiger Woods in 2006.” It was this poll. The results were as follows:
Winning the PGA 2%
Winning the British Open 2%
Winning the AP
Athlete of the year 3%
Finding out that his wife, Elin, was with child 93%
That is the best thing that happened to him this year. I wanted to know who were the idiots that represent the 7%. The best that had happened to him this year, the great Tiger Woods, is having a baby. His wife is pregnant. I think the people can do the math in that pole. We know what is important, and we need to set our priorities in accordance with that.

May your family be blessed this year. May you be a holy family. As the opening prayer said, “Help us to live as the Holy Family, united in respect and love. Bring us to the joy and peace of your eternal home. Grant this through the Lord Jesus Christ, your Son, who lives and reigns with you in the Holy Spirit, one God forever and ever. Amen.